@hell_homer: words are just a big scam. they all just mean other words. so you keep on using even more and more words. that's how they get you.
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@thatUPSdude: Think the walk of shame sucks now, imagine doing it in the 80s in corduroy pants. Everyone heard you leaving.
@brunopieroni: "Ok, guys, before you start calling me a pervert, let me just say I found a great source of protein." — The first guy who ever milked a cow.
@Shock_Monster: Me: That the new iPhone? Him: Yup! The 5S! Me: What's the difference? Him: The C stands for "Cheap" Me: What about the S? Him: "'Spensive"