@awescar: Working on a screen play that involves zombies invading a prom. I'm calling it "Prom Nom Nom"
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@BoogTweets: Me: *lets a radio active spider bite me* [hours later] Me: * uncontrollably eating bugs* THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE DEAL
@hstweetheart: Ariel: "But I love him, daddy!" *sobs as King Tritan rips her iPhone away and unfollows PrinceEric69*
@eminmien: "Faster!" I yell, dropping into the bank from the open skylight. "I'm trying!" Shouts my grandma from above, furiously knitting more cable.
@notacroc: Nurse: we need to draw some blood Me with a fine arts degree: *hastily reaches into backpack* i saved my good marker for this