@Samzen_: World War III will happen when Jason Statham kidnaps Liam Neeson's daughter.
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@Adam14: Hey, people who don't properly re-seal your half empty bags of potato chips... what's it like eating spider eggs?
@weinerdog4life: Whenever you ride an elevator with other people, it's best not to mention your imaginary friends even if someone is standing on Carl.
@deadstick_ron: [Dog office] Dog 1: excuse me this is my desk - I pissed on it so.. Dog 2: I just pissed higher on it D1: son of a D2: SON OF A WHAT, DAVID?