@robfee: Wow, 5 years ago we had Steve Jobs and Neil Armstrong. Now we have no jobs and no arms.
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@Fickle_Filly: The Five Stages of Christmas Shopping Grief: - denial - anger - strong language - moderate violence - a lifetime ban from Toys R Us
@WilliamAder: Whenever someone jokingly replies, "Blocked," I laugh and laugh and then go check.
@TheDairylandDon: Where do avocados come from? Uh, well, when a crocodile loves a pear very much...
@gojarbe: [wedding] i wrote my own vows *removes paper* "chickety china the chinese chicken" whoops wrong one *2nd paper* "if i had $1,000,000"