@ABurgerADay: Writing cuss words on the white space of textbook pages is marginally offensive.
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@greggjgc79: Excuse me, you with the heels that make your calves perfect, designer dress that accentuates your curves.... You have lettuce in your teeth
@iLikeCatShirts: [Red Lobster] Waiter: we're offering Endless Shrimp. Me: bring me the endless shrimp <5 days later> Waiter: please leave, I have a family
@vodkachops1: Today TO DO list: 1) vacuum huge spider in living room✔️ 2) panic✔️ 3)throw vacuum cleaner outside✔️ 4)buy new spiderless vacuum
@Reverend_Scott: [interview] Okay, don't let him know ur a vampire. "What kind of person do u see when u look in the mirror?" OH COME ON