@StellaRtwot: Wtf neighbor I waved to you last week
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@david8hughes: [date] Me: you wanna see what desserts they have? Wife: how about we go home & I'll let you- Me [calls waiter]: what desserts do u have?
@Dpressedspartan: My class teacher once said "Write and Practice." Turns out she was right. I practiced on my desk just before I started my exam and it worked
@NoBadHairDays2: A friend asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. My response: Oh, about 20 minutes.