@MrGeorgeWallace: Y'all are gonna be sorry when I figure out how to breed spiders and bees and my army of "spees" is stingin' and bitin' you and shit
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@Lovestained555: If you put healing crystals in a sock and beat someone with it do they cancel each other out?
@wesleybordelon: Standing in the boys clothes section at Kohls waiting for my wife. I just realized I look creepy. Better move to the little girls section.
@AsgardianRose: No animal is more conniving and deceptive than Guinea Pigs, whom are neither pigs or from Guinea.
@TheCatWhisprer: Accidentally connected my Fitbit account to Facebook and now everyone knows I only walked 13 steps yesterday.