@LanieLalaBugs: Yeah yeah "Friends with Benefits" are cool but have you tried "Friends with Batteries"? Less drama!
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@jokeymcjokeface: Crime would drop to 0% if police uniforms were scary clown costumes. "Put your hands up and state your favorite balloon animal!"
@briancthayer: Be specific when saying "BYOB": [bursts into house] Hey, I brought beers! *7 pastors wives shut their Bibles disapprovingly*
@robdelaney: Vaccines comes from doctors --> Doctors are part of Obamacare --> Vaccines are BAD #Bible #AmericanSniper