@AmnesiaRose: Yes you impress me. But so does a squirrel crossing a telephone wire.
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@djdarrellripley: Her: Let's read your horoscope... Do you believe in astrology? Me: No. That's such a scam. Well, at least that's what my psychic says.
@Ideal_Victoria: Him: how about we finish dinner and you can show me your bedroom Me: why wait? *pulls out cellphone and flips through photos of my room*
@matt___nelson: 911: what's your emerg- ME: I'VE BEEN SHOT 911: ...why would you interrupt me like that?