@LOsepyan: Yes, your honor, but in my defense I thought he was stung by a jellyfish
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@robfee: Dear Ninja Turtles, Why are you wearing masks? There are no other giant, mutated turtles. No one's gonna mistake a different turtle for you.
@smithsara79: The fastest land animal is me when I'm upstairs and hear my dog about to throw up in the living room
@BiIIMurray: I think abs are for guys that don’t have the confidence to wear a nice T-shirt to the pool.