@skitzoette: Yes,I put my kid on a leash. I'm not scared of her being abducted. I just REALLY wanted a puppy instead.
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@Bandersnaaatch: Until my sneezes have time to figure out their beliefs, please stop blessing them.
@serialmatrix: How school works: In class: 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: John had 4 apples.He eats one and gives one to a friend. Calculate the Sun's mass.
@rickolantern: When you're on a diet everything smells like cookies. Except the guy beside me on the city bus. He smells like sardines Delicious sardines
@imdaintyaf: Hub: You ready to go? Me: In a minute, I'm beating the kids. [Cut to me just decimating the kids at Mario Kart]