@Cali_Kid_Mike: Yesterday I told my aunt that DTF means "Doing the Facebook". Her daily posts are much more entertaining now.
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@GoldenSpirals: Why did Yogi Bear only have a collar and a tie, and not a full dress shirt? *Patiently waits as you all Google pics of Yogi Bear*
@audipenny: I looked at a shelf once online and now every ad is like "SO YOU LIKE SHELVES??????" and everywhere i go i think a shelf is following me
@_mindflakes: (boom boom clap) (boom boom clap) Daisy you're a dog you're a good dog Playing in the park Gonna eat some cool bugs today
@Izianikapani: Construction sites are dangerous places. I nearly blacked out holding in my stomach as I walked past one.