@Cyd10e: Y'know the trouble with nude dancing is that not everything stops when the music does.
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@simoncholland: Thanks for always acting surprised by breakfast in bed like you slept right through the great pots and pans avalanche of 6:45 AM.
@SamGrittner: POLICE OFFICER: "Do you know why I pulled you over?" ME: "Because you know I love riddles."
@ruinedpicnic: me:(nervously) so I gotta fight one of these things? zookeeper: what? no me: I choose...the polar bear zookeeper: why would you choose that