@chinkydeliciae: You and your happiness can go straight to Walmart. Or whereever your "hell" is.
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@chelliet22: Winter. When trees are bare, and you can see into your neighbor's yard, and omg, that's Mrs. Hood's body he's putting into their fire pit!
@ThisOneSayz: Save your voice calling for your kids. Just open a bag of chips and they'll materialize out of nowhere.
@joejwest: DOROTHY: What do these shoes do? GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame [tries new pair] And these? G: Wait- D: [clicks heels] [turns into hamburger]
@AmishPornStar1: You know you're getting old when you sound like a women's tennis match just trying to get out of bed.