@trevso_electric: You are like snow. White. Pretty to look at. I used to like to play with you but now I'll pay someone to get rid of you.
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@causticbob: BREAKING: Swiss Police confirm that, when arrested, all seven FIFA officials threw themselves on the ground and pretended to be injured.
@iwearaonesie: me: Did you brush your teeth? 9: Yes me *hands him a glass of orange juice* 9: Do I have to? me: Yep. Told you not to touch my Cheetos
@caseytduncan: The worst part about getting kidnapped would be when the news told everyone your real height and weight.
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: I was buying ice cream, Pop Tarts and mayonnaise. She had organic vegetables & Kombucha. The check stand divider was mostly symbolic.