@vapidaccount: You are the pebble in my shoe of people.
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@markedly: Me: *accidentally types url wrong one time* Navigation Bar: [every day for 15 years] Do you wanna go to Faceboot today? Huh? You wanna visit a boot with a face on it? Huh, you piece of shit? Is that what you wanna do? Moron.
@knot_eye: I was so happy my mail order bride arrived today. My Wife wasn't. She did say I can use the crate as a doghouse. Odd, we don't own a dog.
@hello_saylor: Hotel room bathrooms really overestimate how much I want to see my own naked body.
@ThePocketJustin: Sheryl Crow: This ain't no disco. This ain't no country club either. Sheryl Crow - The world's worst archaeologist.