@ElodiaHugesfxh: "You ask." "No, you ask!" "Will you please ask?" "Why can't you ask?" "Fine... Hey my FRIEND wants to ask you something!"
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@XplodingUnicorn: What I was supposed to teach my kid before kindergarten: 1) phonics 2) writing 3) math What I actually taught her: 1) the dance to Thriller
@Bizarro_Mark: Do not tell a kid you didn't understand his joke unless you have 4 hours free to hear the explanation.
@bourgeoisalien: I thought my cat was just quiet. Found out he's been seething with anger for 8 years. But in a really, really cute way.
@adamzopf: I'd run a marathon but I don't know if I can handle the commitment. I mean a lifetime of telling every person you meet you ran a marathon?