@possibilyss: You better lock your doors tonight, person who taught my parents texting.
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@BromanConsul: My brother goes to "Peninsula High." When the class of 2015 got senior shirts made, no one decided to regulate them.
@prttylttleditty: Twitter is where the nerds from highshool shine because we know how to use correct grammar, metaphors, & sarcasm correctly. And we can read.
@imchriskelly: "What charities do you donate to?" "I mostly just leave sunglasses all over the world."
@RowdyBowden: We're gathered here today to mourn the loss of Derek. His last words were "Watch me try and keep my eyes open while sneezing!"