@slaughthie: You breed dogs? Don't they do that on their own?
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@PLATINUM2000: Me: I killed another one, boss. Mob boss: You don't work for me. Me: I volunteered. Mob boss:*Looking angry* Me: I'm gonna get back to work.
@PatsHoppedUp: Doc: Maam, due to the accident your daughter cant... Mom: Cant what?! D: She cant even. She literally cannot even. M: *single tear falls*
@AlfKilledMyCat: Learning spanish is bloody hard. I wish the english had conquered more of the world, I'm suffering from their laziness
@claire_mudie: If you lost your needle in a haystack then I don't think you were responsible enough to have had a needle in the first place. Needle loser.