@leechee420: You can be anyone you want on twitter, so I'm a little surprised so many guys chose "creepy weird dude."
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@McGunnersite: I'm giving up alcohol for a month. Wait sorry, that didn't come out right : I'm giving up. Alcohol for a month.
@Karate_Horse: A fun thing to do is take a group picture at a party. Then leave & print it at Walgreens. Buy a frame & place it on the mantel at the party.
@HappyHijabbi: *Brings 8 year old back to hospital nursery with receipt* This one doesn't listen anymore...Can I get a new one?
@CVTBaby: When the ex saw 2 wine glasses in my sink, I hope he thought, "she shared a bottle w/ a hot guy" not "drinking alone 2 nights in a row"