@ibid78: You can give a centaur a fish AND lead him to water, which is pretty awesome.
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@jergarl: [7am] *drinks 19 cups of coffee for work *can't stay awake [9pm] *takes a sip of coffee [2am] I should vacuum the dog
@XnotafunnyladyX: Apparently I have a few "tells" when I'm angry. But I light things on fire when I'm happy too so don't pretend you know me.
@MonSwanson: I can't wait for my grandma to ask me repeatedly why I don't have a boyfriend "because I'm such a pretty girl". I'm a psycho, grandma.