@SomthinBoutSara: You can now buy candy unwrapped and avoid any effort at all to eat it. USA! USA!
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@Scott_A_Gilmore: People named Thomas, your nickname isn't "Thom" it's Tom. "Thom" thounds sthupid and prethenthiuos.
@TimDuffy: Thanksgiving is going to be hard this year because half my family dances to remember and the other half dances to forget.
@BamDebikins: Yes, mother, I have gained weight. No, it was not appropriate to point it out by pinching my muffin top in front of thirty people.