@Donna_McCoy: You can tell a lot about a person by how early their neighbors call the cops on Thanksgiving.
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@SteveKoehler22: Our daughter ran away from home once when she was a teenager. We were frantic. Within months, we called the police to report her missing.
@BrandonBrown522: Paranoid? I don't even know what that word means. I don't have time to learn new words, people are trying to kill me.
@krishna_van: People accuse me of never giving a damn about anyone but myself, but I distinctly remember saying 'bless you' when someone sneezed last year
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Social media is great. Before Facebook I'd never know what the girl who wrote "dirty Jew" on my 8th grade locker was thankful for this year.