@Donna_McCoy: You can tell a lot about a person by how early their neighbors call the cops on Thanksgiving.
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@man_spach: [on a test drive] Me: Haha the heated seat feels like I peed my pants! Dealer: This car doesn't have heated seats. Me: Does it have napkins?
@andylevy: twitter getting rid of the 140-character limit is a bad idea. the ability to say what you need to say in as few words as possible is (1/533)
@unburdenunbound: Google would like to use your current location. Allow/Deny? Allow *100 Google employees throw a party at my house*
@WhatevaConc: Make it awkward today by asking people what they did for Valentine's Day. When they answer "dinner", you should say "no...after that".