@lilgapeach32: You can tell a lot about a woman by how she slices brownies. For example: if she throws the knife at you, you should pick up some midol.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@singwithTaffy: Please, by all means, call my landline. I'll reply with a postcard attached to a helium balloon
@samalmightysam: I wanted to kill myself by drinking 100 beers, but when I finished my second one, I felt much better.
@primawesome: My mom was the best mom. I hope your mom spends today thinking about what she could've done to get on my mom's level.