@n0tblonde: You can tell a lot about a woman from her hands, for instance if they are firmly around your throat she is probably slightly upset.
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@slimpickins_: The problem with studying ancient Chinese art is I want some Mexican art a half an hour later.
@GrantTanaka: "Can you validate my parking?" "You parked beautifully. Your dad would be proud." *wipes away tears* "Thanks."
@JayJazzi: A policeman came into my house and told me to put my hands up.I told him that he wasn't a DJ and we laughed and laughed and now I'm in jail.
@JaymayAllDay: 1st grade: Color inside the lines. 10th grade: Color outside the lines. Art School: Snort the lines and then go color.