@MensHumor: You can tell by a woman's feet how she feels about you. If they are behind her ears, she likes you.
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@OhNoSheTwitnt: No thanks, babies. If I'm going to let something inside of my body that's going to destroy my figure, it'll be cheese, bread and booze.
@SarahThyre: During love scenes in a Wes Anderson movie, the sound effects guy rubs a baguette against corduroy.
@lilgapeach30: Girls. Don't get upset if your twitter crush stars a really hot girl or even retweets her cause she is prolly really a dude. Stay calm.