@mstern68: You can tell which inmates were involved in organized crime because their cells are much neater than other prisoners'
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@rickkondell: Saw a homeless guy at McDonald's begging for money, told him I'd buy him something to eat. He said no thanks, getting money for Taco Bell.
@KrunkedRobot: Whole Foods added a 10 items or less checkout line as if anyone can afford to buy more than 10 items at a Whole Foods.
@notacroc: [1st date] Her: we should keep religion out of this *religion gets up & leaves the table* Me: see what u did? *I get up and chase after it*