@JD_KC: You can't fix stupid but you can fantasize about slapping the shit out of it.
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@david8hughes: The first fireman to get called to rescue a cat in a tree must have had the hose wrestled from him before someone told him to get a ladder.
@Donna_McCoy: The nice bed in my guest room says "Get comfortable." But the shower stall with no tub in the bath say "Not too comfortable."
@tchrquotes: [Shipwreck diary] Day 1: Luckily the ship has enough food for 3 months. Longer if I ration well. Day 2: I am out of food.