@JD_KC: You can't fix stupid but you can fantasize about slapping the shit out of it.
@slaughthie: "Oh hey there, didn't recognize you with your cap on," I say flirtatiously to my toothpaste.
@Dr_powpow: I have nothing in common with people that learn from their mistakes
@ch000ch: *crawls back up a waterslide for 2 hours* did you say "go dudette" or "no not yet"
@SavageAphrodite: Nothing cures a hangover like a positive pregnancy test.
@SeanInCypress: I don't claim to know what happens inside the dishwasher, but I'm guessing that it's like the first 15 minutes of Saving Private Ryan.