@LuvPug: You can't tell me what to do, you're not my dog
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@rcromwell4: Youngest cried because Tooth Fairy was in the house while we were sleeping and I can't argue with her logic regarding intruders.
@PurrrrrfectCat: If ignorance truly is bliss, my coworkers must be in a constant state of euphoria.
@icecube: Stealing endorsements is not how you become the president of the United States, homie. Leave my name out ya mouth...
@RumAndReeses: My husband grew a beard and suddenly I'm having to karate chop every woman we pass.