@IntrepidDeviant: You don't know laziness until you rob a bank & choose to wait for the amount you stole to be announced on news rather than count it yourself
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@DebHawk12: I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
@3sunzzz: Tip from my mom: Always wear your bathrobe when at home. Then if somebody stops by unexpectedly you're "just about to hop in the shower".
@mejustbeth: It seems like I only lose weight when I don't buy ice cream. Can someone else start buying my ice cream for me please?