@blaha_Who: You don't know pissed off until she tells you to go sleep on the couch, an you take all the covers with you.
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@ShutUpThatsWho: [invention of blue cheese] "this cheese has gone off" sell it "but it's gone mouldy" I SAID SELL IT! "fine" & double the price "are u ok?"
@longwall26: We don't have wifi in Tennessee. I just pray my tweets into my phone and let Him (#Christ) do the rest.
@Dmvm1977: When I get home to find my wife naked in the tub, seductively asking me to "warm her up", I dont waste a second.. to throw in a hairdryer