@andrewmonea: You don't need to wear clothes in public if you can run fast enough.
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@Tommytoughstuff: *Looks around nervously* The steam from my pasta is ungluing my chest hair toupee and the other mafia bosses are taking notice.
@MikeCanRant: Hi yes, I'd like the cheeseburger "How would you like that cooked?" *gets right up in waitresses face* With frickin fire, obviously
@WritePlay: "What an awesome body-" Oh... thanks. I work out- "- of research." - formulas. I work out formulas. *sips tea* I do a lot of math.
@noduffers: I just called one ex a calculator and another a potential murder victim so if you're looking for metaphors, I'm probably the grapefruit.