@alldrolledup: You ever pump your gas slowly on purpose so no one realizes you only had $3 on you
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@P1ssed_K1d: Woman at drive-thru just called me "honey." Headed home to tell my wife to take a god damn hike.
@jonnysun: teacher: are u a visual thinker, auditory thinker, or kinesthetic thinker me: oh im not a thinker
@NicestHippo: Two ads? IN A ROW? On this website that gives me access to all the music ever made? I won't stand for it
@ibid78: Keep your friends close but your enemies closer. No closer. Become one with your enemy. You're now your own worst enemy. Don't freak out.