@AndyAsAdjective: You gotta hand it to him. Otherwise, we can't finish this relay race.
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@ShanaRose21: Imagine if Trump becomes President and we are invaded by aliens. Alien: Take us to your leader. America: *Looks ashamed* Are you sure?
@murrman5: "when people say different color bell peppers taste different" [doctor nodding] I meant anything bothering you physically
@PaperWash: [stranded on Mars] me: [journal day 1] I have enough rations for 300 maybe 400 days me: [journal day 2] I am out of rations