@bryanmcc74: You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away and know when to run - ORIGAMI not for everyone !
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@FuckabillyRex: If you're the kinda person that gets antsy when people stand on an escalator instead of walking, try a blood curdling scream, they'll move.
@dyldonot: [tv interview] I'm with Amy. Her house was damaged by the floods, how are you? [cut to Amy crying] MORE LIQUID IS THE LAST THING WE NEED AMY
@toastymoe: The longest 30 seconds of your life happen when you shut the router off to reset the WiFi
@PhuckinCody: [starbucks] BARISTA: can i get a name? ME: sure. you look like a Tiffany BARISTA: no i mean a name for the order ME: oh! we'll call this "the most important order of the day"