@FreshTerritory: You guys are even more beautiful now that I'm wearing my "wine glasses".
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@IamEnidColeslaw: my date is in 2 hours, which means I have very little time to fix my glasses and fix my bangs and get a career and lose 50 pounds
@gwatts77: Facebook people don't like Twitter because they need picture illustrations to understand the joke.
@annadrezen: My friend offered me a free pole dance class. I said no. With my debt, the last thing I need to find out is that I'm great at pole dancing.