@Alex_LaVallee: You guys know monogamy is NOT a type of wood, right?!?
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@jwoodham: The only way I'm coming to your wedding is if YOU get ME a gift. You just found lifelong love, I think I deserve a blender more than you do.
@YeahDrewisOn: I've learned there are two types of people in this world: People I trust to help me bury bodies... ...and bodies
@Dmvm1977: OMG! My boss has choked on his sandwich and stopped breathing!! Should I call an ambulance? Its been 16hrs.. I didn't wanna make a fuss.