@Shelts99: You had me at 'I've had 8 vodkas & I hate my boyfriend'
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@GalaxyKate: Academic paper protip: end your Conclusion section with "just as the old woman in the forest predicted" or "in defiance of the prophecies"
@JediGigi: Him:You married? Me:Aww You think I'm that pretty? H:Ma'am just filling out your pape- M:SO I'M UGLY? H:I'll tell the therapist to hurry
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: *gets all four daughters dressed* Wife: I want everyone in Christmas dresses. Me: But- Wife: Everyone. Me: Fine. *puts on my dress*