@eye_spyder: You hear about that roman ruler who found the fountain of youth? Emperor constant teen.
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@Gooooats: Nothing is more terrifying than hearing your wife yelling at your kids about something only to have them respond, “but dad said we could!”
@pleatedjeans: "Ostriches can't fly" said the totally racist stewardess who made me dismount my ostrich & board the plane on foot like a lowly commoner
@haolegurl808: One thing you can count on: For every idiot proof system devised, a new and improved idiot will arise to overcome it.