@juliussharpe: You know it's not believable when six people rob a bank in a movie if you've ever tried to organize a dinner for six people.
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@kumailn: "I'll be a dentist. Then they'll love me." "We're terrified of dentists." "I'll kill a lion!" "It was a beloved lion with a name." "Dammit."
@Parentpains: Whenever I'm on twitter I always turn my phone upside down to try and collect spare change from your pockets.
@KateWhineHall: I cleaned off the top of my desk so I'd feel like I accomplished something. Now I just have to clean up the floor where I threw everything.
@jctwritesstuff: Me: I should tell him how I feel. Beer: Nah. Vodka: Just be sweet about it. Whiskey: Or yell it. Tequila: MAKE SURE YOU CRY GUYS LOVE THAT