@Kimpulses: You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Scimommy: Overheard 10 plan her b-day party with her BFF, including renting several hotel rooms for a mega sleepover. Somebody tell her, I can't.
@PandAmonnia: "YES, MOM! NO CRUST! You've been making my sandwiches for 37 years now, STOP ASKING!" *mom leaves crust on so you'll finally move out*
@MattMcElaney: Mom always said she didn't have a favorite child, which was tough because I don't have any brothers or sisters.
@timdonakowski: Naming my daughter "A Relationship" so I don't have to worry about punks wanting to be in her.