@envydatropic: You know the jack in a box that scared the life out of you when you were a child? That's me as an adult cooking with my smoke detector
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@pleatedjeans: Fear not, ugly caterpillar. For one day you will become a beautiful butterfly [emerges from cocoon] AH WTF I'M A MOTH THIS IS BULLSHIT
@TheBoydP: *16 calls me at office* 16: Are you stopping at the grocery store tonight? Me: No 16: You're out of beer Me: Ok I will, what do you want?
@SamReidSays: Netflix, stop making me wait 15 seconds between episodes. I can't click because I'm eating cereal and a sandwich.
@TattedChanel: 'Find a guy who ruins your lipstick, not your mascara ' lol mate ruin any part of my makeup nd ur gettin smacked down