@moooooog35: You know the person in exercise videos that's doing the easy version of everything? I'm the guy behind that person eating chips.
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@KeetPotato: [jim henson reveals kermit the frog for 1st time] me: jim: me: jim: me: jim: "what do you think?" me: "i mean have you ever seen a frog?"
@ashmensch: It's the remix to ignition, I'm a terrible magician, I cut your grandma in half, And now my rabbit is missing.
@JermHimselfish: I like how commercials for gum seem to be predicting a cold, dystopian future where our survival depends on the freshness of our breath.
@Ivsy01: I like extremes. I want a nerd, but he's gotta be an extreme nerd. Like I don't even want to understand what he's talking about.