@moooooog35: You know the person in exercise videos that's doing the easy version of everything? I'm the guy behind that person eating chips.
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@doublewenis: My wife used to get so fat that she had to go to the hospital; then a person would fall out of her. That doesn't sound normal.
@PaperWash: me: God? God: yes my child me: I need help- God: ask and thou shall receive me: -moving into my new apt God: me: God: me: hello?
@erica_rosie: I used to wonder what it'd be like to read other people's minds. Then I got a Twitter account, and I'm over it.