@YUCKYBOT: You know what they say? Once you go white, you'll rob the world of it's resources and murder indigenous peoples.
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@Chelsea_Elle: Leaving my browser history open in case anyone in this coffee shop tries to steal my laptop when I'm in the bathroom.
@Dawn_M_: So embarrassing when you leave the bathroom and someone points out you have toilet paper stuck to your teeth.
@Kyle_Raney: "I'd like to make a toast." - piece of toast telling her toast husband she wants to start a family
@RoosterMustache: Assert dominance over your boss by choosing an elevator button higher than the one he picked & act like its a big deal to wait for his floor