@DRUNKdadding: You know when your cat looks at your kids like "thanks to you I've been out of food for 3 days and nobody's noticed" .....?
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@Dawn_M_: I would like to be a zombie because when someone asked me if I had a boyfriend I could just eat them.
@TylerActually: You know, gas prices really aren't that bad when you consider that you're essentially buying dinosaurs in liquid form.
@smirkykev: In my experience, the quickest way to escape Jury Duty? As they read out the charges, yell out, "Oh c'mon...even I've done THAT!"