@jwoodham: "You know who needs more attention? Celebrities. Maybe we could give them trophies or something." Good idea, Oscar. What'd you have in mind?
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@TheMichaelRock: HR: Did you tell Brenda she was stupid? Me: Oh god no! I said she is stupid. HR... Me: There's no past tense with that one.
@LittleMissZesty: Transform chocolate into a balanced meal by eating it standing on one leg WITHOUT falling over. Chocolate yoga: it's the next big thing.