@Xalqee: You know you're an Alcoholic when you can't even say the word "sober" without making air quotes
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Book_Krazy: Mom: I think I'll name her Jenny. Dr: I'm sorry, that name is already taken, but you can name her jenny_2828
@huntigula: confuse your coworkers today by telling them you're going to the restroom to do a "number 3"
@wilw: "Miss Yates, why didn't Sam and Frodo just use the eagles to fly the ring to Mount Doom?" - Ted Cruz.
@bourgeoisalien: On the one hand, I want to exercise and take care of myself. On the other hand, it's just more years of living on a planet full of morons.