@liv_thatsme: You know you're old when you see the neighbor's dog chasing some punk teenagers & you root for the dog.
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@BrdnHatesYou: *beats arachnophobia* *trips over child dressed as Spider-Man* *fears spiders again*
@1BigMick: My wife keeps 72 half-empty bottles of stuff in the shower. And if I even look at them, they all throw themselves on the floor.
@TheRealRHB: Cute neighbor mows her lawn almost naked, so I sneak over there at night and sprinkle Miracle-Gro all over her yard.. costly but so worth it