@seethenare: "You like mayonnaise? Prove it." - Costco
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@TheSharona06: "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!!" I scream to my dogs as they all watch me trip, run into the coffee table and spill my coffee all over myself.
@lilgapeach30: Girls. Don't get upset if your twitter crush stars a really hot girl or even retweets her cause she is prolly really a dude. Stay calm.
@Scdavis24: Two things I will never understand the appeal of: 1) Open relationships 2) Hairless cats
@shashaintl: Me: We need to go. 11: Go without me. 7: Sometimes when parents go without their kids, they get arrested, and I can't let that happen.