@Crunch11b: Every time I'm around my mother in law, I wonder who is running hell in her absence.

@Shock_Monster: Him: Come check out my church! Me: Him: They play rock music! Me: Him: It's cool! Me: Does it have church in it? Him: Yes... Me: *click*

@badbanana: Woke up screaming this morning. My apologies to everyone in the meeting.

@britt_anylynn: The sign at the McDonald's I just passed says "We hiring" in case you're wondering what kind of qualifications you need to have to be hired.

@TravLeBlanc: Mary and Joseph chose to have Jesus in a barn rather than spend Christmas with their families.