@curlycomedy: You never see baby pigeons because pigeons are cloned by the government. Next question.
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@TheHatdog: Google Search: -is my toaster broken -can fire ants make toast -bathtub fire, small -house fire, how to stop -is house fire toast a thing?
@nealbrennan: When people are trending on twitter, I know that they died or said something racist.
@DirtMcTurd: *Pulls up to drive-thru window* "Extra toilet paper please" Do you mean napkins? "Sure, whatever"