@curlycomedy: You never see baby pigeons because pigeons are cloned by the government. Next question.
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@stephenjmolloy: Commissioner Gordon: It says here that bats sleep upside down and wee over themselves. Batman: We also poop. CG: We? B: They. I mean they
@TheLeslieMommy: Old lady across from me in ER waiting room just asked me, "So are you sick?" No, I'm just here for the free CNN.
@Bryainiac: I don't know why they are called smart phones, I dropped mine in the toilet and it didn't even try to get out.
@_LittleMsBossy_: Apparently saying 'exist over there' while pointing is not the best way to greet people in the mornings.